2006 Question 3
Response 3A Analysis
Your first paragraph was intriguing and did a great job at grabbing my attention; the only suggestion I have is to reword the first sentence as it seems a bit wordy. As I read on I continued to noticed that again your sentences like, “The narrator tells the readers Anne, who was always looked down on by her father and elder sister for being plain but intelligent and kind, will be happy and fit in at uppercross for the two months she is to stay there.” are stuffed with words. Try taking out a few and this paper would be golden. You have great points for each of your supporting paragraphs, like the contrast between the countryside and Bath. Overall I think that this it is well written and make you sound educated on the matter.
Response 3B Analysis
The introduction is okay but repetitive, you use the same words in similar sentences like “confusion of the play” which could be cut out as you already mentioned a “confusion of the plot” just a few sentences ago. Your points are good but you cloud them with too many details about the story as a reader this gets boring and makes your argument less forceful. Your contrast between city and countryside help your argument but this is lost when you change your argument to proving that this play is a comedy. Although the setting plays an important role in the comedic factor, it is not what the prompt was addressing. At the end it seems as if you just summarized the play even though it is proven in your essay you did understand that the countryside was a peaceful location.
Response 3C Analysis
Ana,
ReplyDeleteQuality response! You wrote very clear and concise responses to the past AP Lit. essays and they were nice and easy to read. I think you are missing a few elements though. Although they were nice and easy to read they were quite short and could have included more info on what the essays included and how they should be graded according to the AP board. One thing I liked about your responses however was the fact that you were talking directly to the people who wrote the essays. I think if I had wrote one of these essays that would be very helpful to read and understand what I could have done better. As a future AP Lit. test taker I think it could help me understand what I can do on the test so thank you! Overall, great post!
Ana,
ReplyDeleteI thought it was really interesting how you wrote too the students, I would never have thought of that. I also thought you did a good job overall showing what was wrong with the essays, I always use textual evidence just because it makes my points more clear, you did that for the first two essays it was just the third that was lacking. Also I think it would have been helpful if you elaborated on the DIDLS and how the students used them incorrectly or correctly. I agree with you that the first student essay sounded wordy and pompous, it needed to be more precise and less confusing. You did a really good job, I can tell you put time and effort into your post.
I like how you responded directly to the writers just like these comments. I thought that you did a good job of covering the essays, but you did not really look at rhetorical techniques. Though grammar and mechanics are important to these essays, I think we should probably focus more on DIDLS and how the writer tries to show the meaning of the text. So for next time, I would definitely try and add in your thoughts on how well these writers answered the magic AP Lit question. For example, in the second essay, how does the writer's contrast affect the reader's interpretation of the meaning of the piece? Does the third essay even have a thesis describing the theme statement?
ReplyDelete